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uranium_ore_sample.jpg

Two used units, anyway. You need to move quickly if you want the cheap one for $23.99:

Cracked casing. Has caused dog to grow third pair of legs. Still adorable. Good product.

Because after that one’s gone, the price jumps up to $2500:

Found this in some old abandoned village while on vacation. Older, Russian model (PU239)? Please inquire about shipping. Not responsible for damage due to radiation or explosions.

Or you could just visit the manufacturer’s website and buy it there.

And no, it’s not a joke, but you wouldn’t know it from reading the reviews on Amazon. The 168 reviews are, in fact, the best reason to check out the listing. Highlights include:

So glad I don’t have to buy this from Libyans in parking lots at the mall anymore.
I bought this to power a home-made submarine that I use to look for prehistoric-era life forms in land-locked lakes around my home town in Alaska. At first I wasn’t sure if this item would (or could) arrive via mail, but I was glad to see it showed up with no problems. Well, almost no problems.

Great Product, Poor Packaging
I purchased this product 4.47 Billion Years ago and when I opened it today, it was half empty.

I bought it for my cat
I bought this for my cat and put it with a flask containing poison, in a sealed box. Do you think he likes it ? I’ve not opened the box yet.

Sean Michael Ragan

I am descended from 5,000 generations of tool-using primates. Also, I went to college and stuff. I write for MAKE, serve as Technical Editor for MAKE magazine, and develop original DIY content for Make: Projects.


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Comments

  1. Anonymous says:

    The funniest bit (i think) is the “Customers Who Viewed This Item Also Viewed” section associated with this item. I’m currently looking at: “DH Classic Yellow Cake 12ct”…cake mix (because of the association with “yellow cake uranium”… i guess), and “BIRTH CONTROL IS SINFUL IN THE CHRISTIAN M… by Eliyzabeth Anderson” ..what?? and *of course*: “JL421 Badonkadonk Land Cruiser / Tank” heheh.

  2. vivi says:

    Lol @ the second one “Not responsible for damage due to radiation or explosions” … Pu239 is weapon grade plutonium … I’m sure either US secret service or Russian mobsters will come hit him pretty soon.

  3. figgalicous.myopenid.com says:

    I agree – this is definitely the weirdest part:

    Tuscan Whole Milk, 1 Gallon, 128 fl oz
    JL421 Badonkadonk Land Cruiser / Tank
    Zubaz Pants
    DH Classic Yellow Cake 12ct
    Wedding Chapel – 10 x 18 With Wood Roof
    BIRTH CONTROL IS SINFUL IN THE CHRISTIAN M…
    UFO-02 Detector
    Guardian Angel
    UFO-01 Detector
    Fresh Whole Rabbit
    Relaxman Relaxation Capsule
    E.A. Brevita Branded Drive-Thru Unit
    The Mountain Men’s Three Wolf Moon Short Sleeve Tee
    Inflatable Toast
    Does God Love Michael’s Two Daddies
    Snakes on a Sudoku by Francis Heaney
    Wolf Urine Lure-32 oz
    Bhutan: A Visual Odyssey Across the Last Himalayan Kingdom
    Milk Carton Hat Adult
    Knitting With Dog Hair: Better A Sweater From…
    Denon AKDL1 Dedicated Link Cable
    Grim Reaper on Skeleton Horseback Life-Size Prop
    A Million Random Digits with 100,000 Normal D…
    Solid Gold S.E.P. (Stop Eating Poop)
    4 Bottles Liquid Ass Fart Spray
    Uterus W / Fetus Model Set
    Playmobil Safe Crackers (Thieves)
    Forbidden LEGO: Build the Models Your Parents Warned You Against
    Roswell Soil Sample
    Ninja Folding Grappling Hook w/ Black Finish & Rope, Functional
    1500 Live LadyBugs
    Poop Freeze Carry Tote
    How to Raise Your I.Q. by Eating Gifted Children
    Trinitite
    Ramsey IG7 Ion Generator Kit
    Hand Crank Van de Graaff Generator

    O. M. G.

  4. GalileosGhost says:

    I would love to view this Amazon page as it sounds like there are some very funny comments on there, but as I buy stuff from Amazon, it means my account details would get associated with this page as soon as I look at it. So while any sane person with a sense of humor wouldn’t find it strange at all, that people would want to look at it to see the funny comments, the problem is in this day and age, the anti-terror police would take a very dim view of anyone looking at it and some of them would want to put everyone who views it on their lists of people to watch out for in future. I’m guessing as its just ore its relatively low grade, but still useful in educational and scientific projects, but in this day and age theres no way I’ll view that page. Sad that the world is sinking into what is effectively fear of a growing semi-automated police state misinterpreting people actions. This problem seems to extend to a number of hobbyists areas and so people like us are in danger of becoming false positives in the eyes of people who don’t have any interest in science, engineering and art etc..

    For example, some of the suited official people could never imagine why hobbyists would be interested in chemistry, or biology or physics. To them a product like this is scary. Also some of the suited official people could never imagine why hobbyists would want to do dumpster diving in rubbish. (If the equipment is thrown away where you work and your boss says yes its rubbish and ok to take, but you don’t have that in writing, then years later, after that boss has gone, on paper it looks like you are taking ex-service equipment and there are cases of this even happening now they are getting more paranoid about preventing equipment (they don’t understand) falling in the “wrong hands”). As data gathering and data mining technology improves I wonder if we will all be at ever more risk from false positives in this increasingly watched world.

    1. jee says:

      So our homeland security has you too spooked to shop amazon? come on, somebody has to move to the new detention camps.

      1. GalileosGhost says:

        Its not, “too spooked to shop (at) amazon” … its not about shopping at amazon at all. Its about viewing a page so easily perceived as wrong by the people in power and then they will not see the fun in the article, they don’t have a sense of humor, they want to identify people to watch, so if you collect enough false positives from them, (as hobbyists keep on doing) then sooner or later they will seek to punish you even when you think you have done nothing wrong, because you are doing wrong simply by viewing such pages in their opinion. At the very least we are moving towards a world where they will haul you in to question you (thereby deprive you of freedom until you can prove your innocence). Clearly you don’t have any idea about the concepts of false positives or how automated data mining works and how this can be a problem when taken literally by non-technical people without a sense of humor.

        I guess I just need to become blind to how mistakes in growing government systems of control increasingly risk affecting our lives. So much for the American concept of freedom. I didn’t realize its become so devalued that its now treated as though its meaningless

        “They who would give up an essential liberty for temporary security, deserve neither liberty or security” – Benjamin Franklin

        “None are so hopelessly enslaved as those who falsely believe they are free.” – Goethe

    2. Adrian Lodge says:

      After realising I’ve spent over an hour trying to write a concise response I’ll just go with jee’s and add that information/access to dangerous material can be used by the ‘bad’ minority to make weapons but will most likely be used by the ‘good’ majority to recognise and disarm them.

    3. Apis says:

      Uranium ore is worthless if you don’t have a huge processing plant, and you’ll need several tons of that stuff to get any useful amount of Uranium… And you couldn’t make a bomb out of it unless you had some way of refining it into U239, which is extremely difficult to begin with and you would need even more ore still.

      Any terrorist who’s smart enough and has enough resources to pull that off (e.g. that of a country) would likely also realize that there are much cheaper and more efficient ways to terrorize people.

      All this talk about terrorism is a fraud. Anyone with half a brain should realize that. Whatever is the real motive for starting wars and for wiretapping and registering a countries own citizens it’s not to stop terrorism. And it’s happening in Europe to, not just USA.

      Anyway you guys probably don’t have to worry about an Amazon page, we’re likely already on every list there is, just from visiting the make blog… :)

  5. Anonymous says:

    I see less expensive uranium ore on ebay.

  6. Michael Black says:

    The thing is to look for a Fawcett Publications “magazine” about finding uranium. I found a copy a few years back at a used book sale.It’s in magazine form, that was common in the old days though it was a one shot issuance. I can’t find my copy at the moment, but it clearly reflected the fifties where finding uranium was seen as a potential for making money, and individuals got into it. Buy a geiger counter, some prospecting tools, and off you’d go. The magazine made it look not unlike prospecting for gold.

    I suspect that was why construction articles for building geiger counters were common in the hobby electronic magazines at one point.
    I don’t think it was merely about fallout worry.

    Michael